The cliché ‘we are human doings not human beings’ rings true more evidently today in our fast paced, technologically influenced lives. It has become the norm to be action orientated, wearing our busyness as a badge and evaluating ourselves on how much we are doing and achieving. We are more conditioned to ‘do’ rather than to ‘be’.
There is a simple principle called BE, DO, HAVE as a way of being.
Quote – “You’ve got to BE before you can do and DO before you can HAVE. Be clear on who we are, do what needs to be done to have what we want.” Zig Ziglar
Often we operate a Do-Have-Be orientation instead. For example, to HAVE a fit slender body, what you would might DO is follow a diet and exercise regime so you can BE happy. This orientation is often unsustainable. The change is on the outside. Change needs to first occur within to be sustainable and starting with your BE helps with this.
It’s good to start with WHO we are and what’s important to us, your BE. How often do we take a step back and ask ourselves WHY we are doing what we are doing? We get so caught up in the go-go-go of daily life we can neglect to connect with our purpose or calling, our values, our motivators and our influencers.
How clear we are about the “why” affects our impact, commitment, engagement and satisfaction. It also affects our effectiveness, creativity, and ability to maintain and sustain the action.
In the example of wanting a fit slender body, consider what do you have to be BE in order to succeed? Committed, disciplined, intentional, self-aware, accountable?
Being the person you really want to be right now, without having everything in place to reach your goals or not, will bring you closer to the life you want.
In a Life Coaching session you may be encouraged to create an inspiring vision for your life. One client’s vision was: “I am on top of things because I have a plan. I am present and connected at home.” This was her BE. Her DO was, schedule her week on a Sunday night, find an accountability buddy, manage her expectations of herself and not work when the kids were around. Her HAVE was, quality and focused time with her children and husband, paying attention to what they’re doing, better productivity and higher quality work.
Whether you are happy with the results or not, you get something. It may be tangible or a feeling. You are now in a position to evaluate your outcomes – continue on the same path, cease, or re-evaluate. When we re-evaluate, it is important to cycle back through BE to confirm whether our self-assessment was accurate. If so, you can analyse what worked and didn’t work in your previous effort to identify where your actions need to be repeated or tweaked.
Remember, you have a choice to approach your experiences in whatever way you choose. Greater happiness and satisfaction in work and life come from being conscious of who you are and what’s important to you. These act as a base for what you choose to do and create.